How to ask a teacher for a recommendation letter

RReaders in Stanford's admissions office regularly see letters that hint at intellectual arrogance, a sense of entitlement or a request handled badly, and those hints weigh heavily against an otherwise strong file. A colleague in that office liked to tell a story about one. The student was exceptional and probably an admit. According to the teacher, the student had walked into the office one day, tossed the evaluation form on the desk and said, make it happen. The teacher wrote that down, and the reader read it.

The extreme version is rare. The milder version is not, and letters hurt students more often than families think, because a writer's small reservation carries great weight with a reader looking for reasons to choose among strong files.